


What Would Grandma Think?

by bishounen_curious



Series: volleyball dads [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Phone Sex, my kink is awful phone sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-13
Updated: 2015-06-13
Packaged: 2018-04-04 06:25:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4128213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bishounen_curious/pseuds/bishounen_curious
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Suga had definitely had stranger starts to a Sunday morning.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Would Grandma Think?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cabooose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cabooose/gifts).



> a magic conch shell filled my request for [daisuga phone sex](http://caboootie.tumblr.com/post/121148400336/daisuga-phone-sex-requested-by-bishounen-curious). then it turns out she read my other daisuga garbage on this godforsaken website. and i cried. and then i made this. i'm sorry.
> 
> also its suga's birthday today, so celebrate this beautiful day with this piece of filth

“…so then this girl just walked onto the court and slapped me across the face.”

“Oh my god, _why_?”

“I literally have no idea. But that’s not even the worst part. I woke up immediately after, and I swear on my grave that my cheek was fucking _stinging_. Stinging, Suga.”

The setter made a noise of acknowledgement as he cracked his neck. He was more than happy to let Daichi babble over the phone about the weird dream he had that night. Apparently it was of vital importance so he had called his boyfriend up minutes after he had woken up to recount every bizarre detail from his dream. He had been awake and was just lazing around, fiddling with his phone when it rang. 

Besides, Suga had definitely had stranger starts to a Sunday morning.

“I don’t know if I believe in this kind of stuff, but… do you think it means something?” Daichi asked, his voice sounding vaguely apprehensive. 

Suga snorted and decided a little teasing was in order. “Have you done anything you’ve regretted lately? Anything _evil?_ Maybe, I could be wrong, but this could be karma’s way of getting back at you for being so rude to the team all the time.”

“I am _not_ rude to them!”

“Yeah, you are. Everyone thinks you’re scary.” Small snickers left the setter’s mouth. As he did, he cradled the phone closer to his ear, _definitely not_ pretending it was Daichi’s palm or anything sappy like that. 

“Okay, _scary_ and _rude_ are definitely not the same thing.”

“Is that a confession to being scary?” Suga cooed into the phone, relishing in the way he could feel Daichi’s annoyance piercing the cellular silence, “Oh dear, I accidentally ended up in a relationship with a scary man!”

As Suga giggled into the phone some more and Daichi stayed quiet, the moment passed before the captain finally muttered, “If you were here right now, I’d smack you or something.”

The setter tsked. “And that’s why you’re having dreams about random people slapping you~”

Daichi groaned.

For a while after, the couple just argued and teased each other. Suga was more than content with that, and he was positive his brunette boyfriend was, too. It was really nice, the conversation - he just wished it could have happened with Daichi physically there. Teasing your boyfriend on a Sunday was nice, but teasing him while spooning was even nicer.

Eventually, the urge to actually have Daichi over in his bed won out his urge to continually make fun of him, so Suga suddenly changed the topic and probed, “What’re you doing today?”

Daichi stopped himself mid-sentence, and took a second to reevaluate his response. “Well, I’m kinda busy. My grandparents are coming over around noon.”

“Ah.” Suga nodded in understanding (why did he do that this was a phone call), but even he knew he sounded more than a little bit disappointed.

“Sorry.”

He could vividly see the sheepish grin on the captain’s face, how he probably was scratching the back of his neck in mild embarrassment. It only made Suga sigh harder, not being able to see that expression in the flesh today.

“Don’t apologize. Family’s fun!”

“Well, you’ve obviously never spent time with my grandparents before…”

“That bad?” 

“Suga, you can’t even imagine.”

“Shhh, it’s okay. You’re a big boy, I believe in you.”

Daichi made a weird noise over the phone, and after a beat, getting over his embarrassment, he asked, “Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why are you asking?”

Suga toyed with the hem of his black t-shirt as a smile crept up on his lips. “Obviously because I wanted to see you.”

“Oh. What’d you want to do?”

“What we usually do?”

Daichi sounded like he was smiling when he said, “Are you trying to seduce me?”

The setter snorted. “Get your mind out of the gutter.”

“You just said _what we usually do_ , and I hate to break it to you, but _what we usually do_ is _fuck_.”

“We do other stuff, too!”

“I mean, yeah, but it usually ends with you screaming my name.”

Suga coughed, and looked nervously towards his bedroom door, which was thankfully closed. He wasn’t sure if the rest of his family was up yet, and he didn’t want to find out the hard way. The walls in his house weren’t exactly thin, but still… “Are you sure _you’re_ not trying to seduce _me?_ ”

“So manipulative.” But Daichi didn’t sound the least bit mad.

“That’s what you love about me, though.”

Another unidentifiable noise came through from the other line. “Can we not do this?”

“What?” Suga’s hand stopped fingering the soft fabric of his shirt, and he suddenly felt uneasy.

“I’m getting hard and I can’t see you today.”

Suga laughed nervously because he was so relieved that Daichi wasn’t legitimately angry or annoyed at him. “You have a hand, don’t you?”

“Yeah, but I like _yours_ better.”

“What about my mouth? How about that?” Suga purred. This was way too easy.

“Um.”

“Or my ass? You _definitely_ like that.”

“Fuck, Suga, I’m literally-“

“So just touch yourself. It’s easy, I’ll walk you through it.”

“I know how to jerk off, nerd.”

“I know, but you’ve never done it this way before.”

“…What?”

“With me telling you what to do over the phone.”

“I mean, I guess- wait a sec, is this technically phone sex?”

“Yes? Do you want to try it?” Suga shifted on his bed, wiggling himself out of the pile of blankets he slept under and propped himself up into a sitting position against his headboard. He had a feeling he knew what Daichi’s answer was going to be but he just wanted to make sure, just in case.

“Is that even a question?”

He knew it. “You sounded hesitant. Just checking.”

“Well… I’m just _worried._ ”

“Worried?”

“About you.”

“Why?” Suga narrowed his eyes, not following where this was headed at all.

“I mean… you’re so loud.”

Suga couldn’t stop himself from flushing. He curled his toes and stuttered back into the phone, voice defiant, “I don’t _scream_ when I masturbate.”

“In my defense, the last time you were jerking off in front of me you were-“

“Shut up!” Suga tried to hide the redness in his face that Daichi couldn’t even see. “It’s different when you’re _watching_ me.”

“Really?”

“Yeah!” Suga curled into himself, shielding himself from mortification but still went on regardless, “Okay, here: picture getting yourself off normally.”

Daichi took a few seconds before he replied. “Alright. This is kinda weird.”

“Let me talk! Okay, so you can picture that?” Suga heaved out a breath and started to idly stroke his shin. “Now, think about doing it in front of me.” He swallowed. “My eyes watching your hand, sometimes making eye contact, just… looking at every part of you. I’m probably just as hard as you are. I feel good watching you make yourself feel good, and I’m panting and so are you and I just _want you so fucking much_ …”

Suga’s voice trailed off, weak and just a little breathless. He couldn’t hear anything from the other end, and his stomach dropped. Did he just overstep a boundary? “You there?”

There wasn’t a response immediately. Suga first heard something that sounded like heavy breath, and then Daichi’s voice cracked as he muttered, “Oh my god.”

Relief flooded his entirety for the second time that morning. “I thought you hung up.”

“No! I’d never-“ and then something that was unmistakably a moan came through the speaker of his phone and Suga was then grinning ear to ear, “-you’re just too good at this.”

“It’s a secret talent.” Suga felt positively giddy.

“I wouldn’t say _secret_. You say some dirty shit, sometimes.”

“You aren’t exactly innocent, either.” Suga shrugged, and relocated his hand from his shin to the outside of his right thigh, which he began massaging. “But you definitely could say more _dirty shit_ to me.”

“Like what?” 

There was no way that Daichi didn’t currently have his hand shoved down his pants. If Suga knew his boyfriend as well as he thought he did, he was probably just squeezing and twisting the tip of his dick. He always started off like that: Suga had noticed it when he watched Daichi touch himself countless times, and he did the same thing to Suga when he used his hand on him. 

The briefs that the setter had slept in were feeling a little tight, so he brought his hand up to palm himself through the fabric, making just a little effort to catch himself up to where Daichi probably was.

“Like, the other day, when you called me a _slut_. Do you know how many times I’ve jerked off to that?”

“Would… would it be good if I called you a slut right now?”

Suga rolled his eyes, his voice like sugar, “Y’know, asking permission to call me a slut really isn’t that sexy.”

“Fine, then I just won’t say it.”

“Daichi, c’mon…” the setter whined, “I’m barely even hard yet.”

“Suga!” Daichi sounded both extremely shocked and appalled. “Why didn’t you say something?!”

“I just did…?”

“I literally have been fucking my hand this whole time, and we’re only really arguing. And you’re just sitting there, _not doing that._ That’s not cool!”

Suga tried to stifle his giggles to not get Daichi even more flustered than he already was, but then the captain complained _I know you’re laughing at me!_ and Suga gave up trying entirely.

“i can’t help it!” Suga bit his lip, his smile aimed at window, which was aglow with early morning sunshine. “You’re just so cute.”

“ _Suga._ ”

“Don’t even, you’re totally cute.” And then Suga had a thought. “And you know when you’re really cute? When I’m riding you and your mouth just hangs open, and you’re just looking at me like you can’t believe what’s happening.” 

Suga was still cupping himself, and he then started to knead himself through his underwear and unconsciously spread his legs wider. 

“ _How can you say all this shit and not be fucking hard?_ ”

“I’m getting there, don’t worry about it.”

Daichi sounded so adorably-winded when he whined, “If I was there, you would have come already.”

“Really?”

“Mhm.”

“What would you have done to me?” Suga moved his fingers with more pressure into the fabric, more speed against himself. Shifting his lower body he got a more comfortable position and let his hand do what it wanted.

“Suck your dick.”

“And what else?” Suga closed his eyes, finally getting into this.

“That…? I’d suck your dick.”

So much for that.

Suga stopped his hand and looked up at the ceiling, his smile so patient and loving and not even the least bit frustrated, he wished Daichi could see it. “Daichi, you really are cute.”

“Thanks- wait, are you making fun of me again?”

“No, no.” Suga’s tone practically screamed, _of course I am, silly_ but he tried to salvage the moment, “I just wish you were here. I could definitely go for sex right now. The rough kind, where you barely stretch me and just fuck me raw until I can’t breathe.”

“Oh god, yes. Me too.”

“Yeah,” Suga hummed, feeling his length stiffen beneath his hand, “I want that. And you haven’t fucked me from behind in a while. It feels so good. You get in so deep, and that angle… Fuck, _that angle_.”

“Last time we did that-“

“-yeah my parents were home-“

“-you were screaming in the pillow-“

“-i came so fucking hard I almost passed out.”

Yes, this was better. Much better. Mission accomplished. 

Suga had slipped his cock out during their back and forth, and was stroking his length from base to tip, taking his time, squeezing in all the places he knew he liked. A small noise came from the back of his throat, and Daichi moaned when he heard it.

“Next time, I’m fucking you like that.”

‘God, Daichi, please do.”

“And I’m blindfolding you.”

 _That was new_. And right up Suga’s alley.

“Yeah?” Suga puffed out encouragement as he rubbed his thumb quickly over his newly-leaking slit.

“And I wanna eat you out.”

A harsh, pleasurable throb went through his dick. Suga squeaked out a surprised moan because _shit that felt really awesome_ and _they’d never done that before_ and also _okay, maybe Daichi wasn’t hopeless at this after all_. “You do?”

“Yeah. I heard that it feels amazing. I want to do that to you. I want to do everything to you.”

“Please.” Suga actually felt it was necessary to cover his mouth because he was making these strangled, needy little noises and _dammit what if his parents could hear him?_. Unfortunately he was holding his phone and he wasn’t taking the chance of missing any of this phone sex gold, so he choked on his sounds and attempted to stay quiet.

“Suga, you sound like such a slut right now.”

The setter whined through his nose. Fuck fuck fuck. 

“When I rim you, I know you’re gonna love it. Because sluts love everything. You’re gonna be screaming you love it so much, my tongue _fucking_ you.”

“Daichi,” Suga whimpered, lifting his hips to meet his fist as it dragged down his length, “I want it right now.”

“You can’t get everything you want right away. You greedy slut.”

Suga was losing his mind. He tipped his head back against his headboard and worked himself faster and tighter and his belly felt so coiled and warm and everything else that felt good. Where was this coming from? How was Daichi pulling this off when a couple of minutes ago he was a blushing, uncreative mess? What the hell?

Suga panted obscenely into his phone, wanting Daichi to know exactly what his was doing to him.

Daichi’s responsive groan into the phone made Suga ache. “Are you close?”

“Decently.” Suga breathed just a little tauntingly, and focused on his stroking and Daichi’s voice, trying to climb closer towards his peak.

“Yeah, me too, I’m-” and then his voice broke off with a loud noise.

“Daichi?”

“Sorry, I burped.”

Suga stopped his hand and opened his mouth, absolutely floored. “ _Oh my god._ ”

“Heh.”

Suga couldn’t stop from howling with laughter. He half-assedly tried to muffle it into his shoulder with no real effect. “What is wrong with us?”

Daichi was laughing, too. “I don’t know. But I love it.”

“Yeah same.” Suga said with a smile, hoping Daichi could feel it from his bedroom. As dysfunctional as they were at times, Suga wouldn’t trade it for the world. The number of instances they laughed during sex was too many to count on both Suga’s fingers and toes, and that was more than okay with the setter. 

“Would I be a terrible grandson if I just left the house to spend the day with you?”

“Shirking your familial duties to get laid?” Suga tried _so_ hard to sound scolding. “You’d be the worst.”

“Not necessarily!” Daichi got defensive. “About the getting laid part, I mean. If we could just stay in bed all day, sleeping and cuddling and maybe making out a bit, I’d be perfectly content.”

Suga’s heart was doing that thing again where it started to beat too quickly because Daichi was saying things that reassured that Daichi loved him as much as he loved Daichi. He felt a little ridiculous, a little too teenager-in-love-like to feel like his emotional reactions were justified. Despite that, Suga also just wanted Daichi here, to touch him, see him, breathe him in. His body curled into itself a little bit, and he tried not to sound so stupidly in love when he replied, “Me too.”

“Are you encouraging my bad behavior?”

“Only a little.” Suga admitted. “But you would be a pretty awful grandson.”

“I only call them on holidays, anyway. I’m pretty awful already.”

“Um,” Suga bit his lip evilly, because he was about to hate himself just the teensiest bit in the best way possible, “you know what would make you even worse? If you had a boner while talking about your grandparents.”

The most frightened noise Suga had ever heard him make came through the speaker. “ _Why would you even say that?!_ ”

Suga hit his head against the headboard he was laughing so hard. The pain from the collision was nothing compared to the way his stomach was knotting from all his laughter. Daichi made more horrified noises, and Suga went about making an apology through his hysterics. Daichi was shutting him down, calling him a _sicko_ and Suga was having difficulties regaining his composure. 

Alright, Plan B time. 

Suga brought his iPhone away from his ear to peer at the call screen. He clicked the _FaceTime_ button and waited for Daichi to accept his request.

Daichi took his sweet time, probably to punish him. When he finally accepted it and Daichi’s horrified, flushed face popped up on the screen and Suga saw a small version of himself grinning like a jerk in the bottom corner, the setter was absolutely thrilled.

“I love you.” Suga cooed, trying to look sincere and _not_ like the sicko he was accused of being.

“Why are you so mean to me?” 

“Because I love you.” 

Suga blew him a kiss and winked, and Daichi rolled his eyes. However, he did avert his eyes after with a mumbled, “I love you too, jerk.”

Suga cheered to himself and Daichi sighed, knowing he had lost that round. Deciding to take pity on his sulking boyfriend, Suga offered, “Do you wanna keep going?”

Even in the semi-grainy quality of the camera, Suga still noticed Daichi’s face color. “I’m still hard and it’s really distressing me.”

“I am, too. Wanna see?”

“We weren’t talking about _your_ grandparents, Suga- oh wait, _yeah_ , can I?”

The setter shot him a mischievous grin and adjusted the angle until the screen displayed his lower half. It mostly was the view of his slightly bunched up t-shirt andhis cock peeking out of his grey briefs. He couldn’t see Daichi’s face, but all he heard was Daichi whistle, “Nice.”

His hand trailed down his abdomen to grip his cock, and he rubbed his thumb against his head. Suga listened to Daichi’s breathing deepen, and he focused the pad of his thumb on his slit, and Suga let a small noise leave him, for Daichi’s benefit, obviously.

“Why are you so hot?” Daichi’s tone made Suga believe that any thoughts about his grandparents were the farthest from his mind. Excellent.

“I don’t know, why are you so horny all the time?”

“Says the guy jerking himself off right now.”

Suga angled the camera back up to show his face and stuck his tongue out. “And you aren’t?”

“…no.”

“Show me.” Suga pressed on.

Daichi switched from the front camera to the back one, and suddenly Suga saw Daichi’s naked hips and thighs. His fist shallowly stroked himself, squeezing the tip, just focusing on the very tip of his swollen prick and _yes he knew his boyfriend so well._

Suga’s hand started to fully stroke his own prick, dragging the slickness of his precum and sweat all up and down himself. He tried to sync with Daichi’s rhythm, but the captain was being a little too sloppy with his movements. It wasn’t that big of a deal because Daichi was exhaling these little sounds that weren’t quite moans and it was driving the setter up a wall.

Suga played with the sensitive underside, that little button of flesh where his head met the shaft, and he expelled all the air from his lungs and then sucked in a greedy lungful, and repeated and repeated and repeated that while Daichi’s hips thrusted upwards to meet his own fist.

“Daichi,” the setter whined.

“I’m close.” He gasped.

“Yeah.”

“ _Fuck._ ”

“I wanna see your face.” Suga puffed, cradling his phone closer (capturing a flattering angle of his face, of course) and watched Daichi switch to the front camera. Daichi’s lips were parted and his brow furrowed. It made Suga’s entire body ache, and it tore a quiet moan out of him. “Thanks.”

“You’re- _shit_ , so hot.”

Suga reached out the arm that was jerking himself off to pluck a couple of tissues from the box on his nightstand table. With an attempted smile he went back to fucking his fist, but it was hard to hold a genuine smile when the pleasure was building so quickly inside of himself. He bit the inside of his cheek instead. 

Daichi’s eyes were fluttering and he was breathing so fast Suga knew he was about to reach his end. The setter moaned into the phone, quietly, “I wanna kiss you so bad.”

Daichi’s mouth opened wider, and Suga watched him shudder and his face scrunch, and then the screen went black but Suga could still hear his gasping. He probably dropped his phone, and Suga took that opportunity to get the tissues in his hand and jerked off into them until he had to let go of his phone and bite the fleshy part of his palm to keep himself from being heard throughout his house.

He tried to convince himself not to be embarrassed because it was Daichi’s fault that he almost screamed from jerking off.

Suga swallowed the noises and cleaned the rest of himself up before tossing the balled up, sticky tissues in the direction of his wastebasket. He picked up his phone and saw Daichi back on the screen, running his hands through his cropped, sweaty hair. Suga wanted it to be his own fingers there, pulling and scratching it. Suga opted instead to roll onto his side, and rubbed at his hip with his free hand. “Good?”

Daichi had this smirk on his face that looked entirely too sexy on him. “I should call you every time I masturbate.”

“So, everyday before school I should expect a call?”

“I want to smack you with this pillow.”

“What would grandma think?”

“I’m hanging up, goodbye.”

“Tell her your boyfriend says hi!!”

“ _Daichi, are you up? Breakfast is ready!!_ ”

The look on the captain’s face changed so quickly. “Oh my god.” He whispered to Suga, and he looked so panicked and nervous it was adorable. He then shouted, face tilting towards what presumably was his bedroom door, “Yeah, I’m just getting dressed! Be down in a sec!”

Suga was biting his hand to keep himself from losing his shit.

“Suga,” Daichi’s voice was so low, Suga could barely make out what he was saying, “I’m practically naked and I have cum all over my stomach what if she comes in here??? Help me oh my god.”

Suga bit his bottom lip and grinned. “I’ll talk to you later.”

Daichi groaned and hung up. Suga finally let himself go and laughed his head off into his pillow.

**Author's Note:**

> i just don't know anymore


End file.
